We often hide unwanted things in the fog because we are afraid of conflict, wasted effort, or being judged. Afraid of defining conditions for failure, failing, and taking responsibility for that failure. We’re also afraid that if we communicated what we felt, wanted, or desired to others, they could tell us what we don’t want to hear or, worse, deny us what we most want. There are many good reasons to hide things in the fog.
Resentment, Anxiety, and Lies
Things that are hidden in the fog fester. Avoided arguments breed resentment, shielding ourselves from others leaves us lonely, and avoiding responsibility embitters you.
Worse, the more things you hide in the fog the more lies you have to use to explain your emotional state. Then you have to keep track of these lies and justify them repeatedly to yourself and others. No wonder you’re anxious, sad, and have bad moods.
The Fateful Day
But one day, fate will force your hand. When you least need it, something will happen that forces you to confront what you’ve been hiding in the fog for years or decades. It will catch you off-guard and have grown so much that it will destroy your marriage, career, and whatever you’ve tried to protect by keeping it hidden.
Don’t hide things in the fog. They’ll grow and destroy what you try to protect.
"Beyond Order" by Jordan Peterson inspired this post. ↩︎